How We Deal With Suggestive Swag at the Right-Click Household

by anna on July 30, 2009

Me: “Hey, check out this weird lip gloss I got.”


Mr. Right-Click: [examining it; looking dubious.]


Me: “It’s so, you know, you can put it on your whole mouth all at once.”


Mr. Right-Click: [Trying to apply it, looking vaguely uncomfortable.]


Me: “What? You don’t like it?”


Mr. Right-Click: I think that’s supposed to be just for you.”


Me: What do you mean? You don’t want my cooties or something?”


Mr. Right-Click: “No, I think that’s . . . that’s just supposed to be private. That’s a private thing. Not for me. Not for sharing.


Wendy July 30, 2009 at 4:47 am

I agree. No sharing! If I share my chapstick it comes back all squished and lined with grizzly man-beard. If I had that little thing & gave it to hubby it would come back to me looking like a football.

No sharing!

Kerry July 30, 2009 at 5:14 am

Are you SURE that’s lip gloss?

I mean, did it come with a brochure that specifically said it was meant to be applied to your mouth?

abdpbt July 30, 2009 at 5:53 am

Actually, Kerry, you make a good point. It did have packaging that suggested it was to be used as a lip balm, but there is definitely some confusion based upon how it looks.

Heather July 30, 2009 at 5:27 am

Ahahah! That was the funniest Mr. Right-Click response ever! To be honest, it looks terrifying..but intrigues me at the same time. What’s it smell like?

abdpbt July 30, 2009 at 6:04 am

@heather, it’s minty. It’s actually decent lip gloss, but I found some that I like much better (that I had to buy, of course, because that is always how it seems to work out), which is why I didn’t feature this as a commodity fetishism post.

Jozet at Halushki July 30, 2009 at 5:27 am

If you just had a picture of that thing there, with no explanation, I don’t think I could have guessed in a million years what it was. It looks like a hard-boiled egg I’d find under my sofa six months after the last time I made hard-boiled eggs. “Put it on your lips” is the last thing I’d ever consider doing. And I’m a fairly “throw caution to the wind” kind of girl.

abdpbt July 30, 2009 at 6:03 am

@Jozet yeah, it tastes kinda minty, too. When I took these pictures, I was realizing more and more how suggestive it looks. I considered poking a hole in the top of it to emphasize this. But I didn’t want to be dishonest.

foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog) July 30, 2009 at 6:35 am

I would lose that stuff in my purse instantly. I’d suggest a vibrating feature so it would rattle at the bottom of my bag and I could pluck it from the obscurity that is my bag, but would just make this product even more confusing at first glance!

Deb on the Rocks July 30, 2009 at 6:43 am

I want a photo of a thousand of these barreling down the belt of the factory. Some poor women have jobs requiring them to snap lids on nude, greasy dick tips, one after the other. This baffles me. I also want to see the design notes for the product development. Did they go back and forth with the color, to get the right shape of nude? Are they considering a companion product that is nipple-shaped so as not to lose the male/lesbian demographic?

anna July 30, 2009 at 9:45 am

LOL @ greasy dick tips. That’s a good point, though, what to do with the men and lesbians? I mean honestly, they could have chosen any color in the world for the lip balm, and they choose a skin tone? Really? And we’re not supposed to think that’s what it looks like?

The Stiletto Mom July 30, 2009 at 2:16 pm

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! That is freaking hilarious. And can I tell you what a bad idea it was to open this post in a crowded bar in an airport? I’m getting some INTERESTING looks…and I’m in Arkansas….which makes me nervous. :)

lynn @ human, being July 31, 2009 at 12:55 am

I really love this lip pod. It’s perfect because I’m too lazy to lube up both lips separately. But it does look like a vibro-egg. I was actually a little disappointed that it wasn’t. Maybe next year Blogher can get Eden as a sponsor …

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