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“Mommy. It is NOT the drugs talking. Bruin Bear wants pancakes. And chicken-flavored crackers. And White Castle sliders. Or Funions.”
We took Mini in for his second myringotomy this morning. If you’re not familiar with the procedure, a myringotomy is when they put tjoobs in your kid’s ears so that they can drain and are not constantly besieged by ear infections. The first year of life was rough for Mini in the ear infection department–he had five in one season, and they had run out of viable antibiotics in syrup form to give him. We had the first surgery a little over a year ago, but he has outgrown those baby tjoobs and needed new ones. If your kid has ear infections, tjoobs are a miracle. I’m not afraid to say it. For one thing, they clean out all the crap back there, and you’ll notice that your kid will be able to hear dramatically better post-surgery. They have also prevented Mini from getting even one ear infection in the 13 months since his last surgery.
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“Where are my keys! GIMME THE KEYS! DUDES–I’m totally cool to drive.”
That said, I’m never too excited about sending Mini into an OR. Even if it’s the OR at Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles–which is, despite its affiliation with USC, one of the best Children’s Hospitals in the world. Mini’s ENT is the head of Otolaryngology at there. Because the Right-Clicks don’t dick around with medical care. We don’t say, “Oh, do you have the name of an ENT who works on kids?” and trust whatever they give us. We say, “Who is the best doctor within 200 miles of here for operating on kids’ ears?” And they send us to Dr. Gellar.
I cannot say enough good stuff about Dr. Gellar or about Children’s Hospital. In fact, if you are looking for a good charitable organization, you might consider putting Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles on your list. If you’re not familiar with them, you should know that, though they do take regular LA resident patients like Mini, they are best known for the work they do with kids who have rare illnesses that require special care. Kids from all over the place travel hundreds and thousands of miles to be treated by the doctors at the hospital free of charge. You may not know that Derek Fisher, the Lakers’ point guard, left his position with the Utah Jazz a few years ago, took a $6.5 million pay cut, and came back to LA so that he could be closer to Children’s Hospital, where his daughter is treated for retinoblastoma.
The only thing about the whole experience that is somewhat lighthearted, though, is the time immediately before surgery when they give Mini the syringe full of cherry-flavored morphine that the nurses there unabashedly refer to as “happy juice.” Last time, Mini was only 11 months old and if you’ve never seen an 11 month old stoned–well you are missing out. Oh, I don’t recommend trying it at home or anything. But you have to look for the silver lining in these kinds of situations.
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I have definitely seen these eyes before. But not on a toddler.
All went well with the surgery, and Mini has a brand new set of ear tjoobs installed. I think he also might have asked the anesthesiologist out to dinner, but I doubt he’ll remember that in the morning.