Jon and Kate now have a billboard of their own on the Sunset Strip in West Hollywood, which is like the Times Square of Los Angeles, in case you’ve never visited it. But what’s that totally black building underneath it, you know right below the sign, below the ominous storm clouds that were gathering, this morning–September 11th, strangely enough–oh it’s the Viper Room. Why do I know that name? Hmmm, is it because it is a nightclub owned by Johnny Depp. No, that’s not it. Although that’s a strange juxtaposition, isn’t it? Are there a bunch of barfly clubkids who like to watch TLC while getting ready to go out on the town? Dunno.
Wait, I know why it’s familiar! I know! The billboard is directly above where River Phoenix died.
What I want to know is, when they show Kate constantly on the phone now, is she talking to a PR person? Because if so, tell me their name so I can know WHO NOT TO HIRE in the event I ever get famous.