Field Trips, Good(?) News, And Messing With My Head Stuff
Mini went on his first field trip today. I accompanied him, thinking they would need extra help. Turns out I was wrong, since there were about 20 kids and 17 parents. This is undoubtedly reflective of the socioeconomics of Mini’s preschool, but nevertheless it was kind of heartwarming. Everybody wanted to be there, and Mr. Right-Click was seriously bummed he couldn’t come today.
Mini drew him a picture so he didn’t feel left out. I think these are the windows of the bus we took to get to the post office (the destination of the field trip). At the post office, Mini mailed a letter he had written to us. I’m kind of curious to see what it says, because he’s kind of turned into an unreliable narrator about these things: this morning he told me it was “filled with chocolate and vanilla,” and then he just told Mr. Right-Click that it said, “Dear Mommy and Daddy, I love you very much.” But maybe those are the same thing, if you are a three-year-old, now that I think about it.
On the field trip I was speaking to one of the other moms who had been reading my blog, and she said she was surprised I was there because of how sick I’d been. The truth is, today I am feeling better. Like, not 100% better, but better enough that now I’m starting to mindfuck myself because it’s not quite 11 weeks yet and where is the vomiting? Is not the vomiting necessary for the maintenance of the health of the baby demon spawn thing? And now that I think about it, my boobs are slightly less sore, should that be happening? Most alarming: I ate In ‘N’ Out Burger for lunch and all of it stayed down, without taking any Zofran today.
Four years ago, this same thing could have happened and I’d just be throwing a party for myself at this point, but this time I’m a little spooked. I think mostly it’s because going through this again has just underscored how badly I never want to do this again, and if something were to go wrong I’m just not sure I have the strength to try again. It’s not the end of the world and certainly there are other options, but damn that would be a bummer, all things considered.
I go back to the OBGYN on Thursday, so until then at least it’s a two-day wait this time instead of that whole awful two-week nonsense. Here’s to hoping I’m just being paranoid, and/or that tomorrow I throw up after brushing my teeth.