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15 Jokes About The iPad I’m Apparently Not Too Mature To Make

15 Jokes About The iPad I’m Apparently Not Too Mature To Make

  1. iPad: It Doesn’t Have Wings, But Then It Doesn’t Have A Keyboard, Either.
  2. iPad: Because you’re too male to use a tampon.
  3. Good news: even virgins can use iPads!
  4. Don’t be embarrassed if you’re the first one in your class to get an iPad. Everybody matures at their own speed.
  5. iPad: Because Who Isn’t Scared Shitless Of Getting Toxic Shock Syndrome From A Kindle?
  6. The iPad comes in three memory sizes: 16GB, 32GB, and the 64GB for heavy flow days.
  7. The iPad works for ten hours or overnight!
  8. The iPad is slim and lightweight, and you can even swim with it!
  9. Scratch that last one, you probably shouldn’t try swimming with it. Just to be safe.
  10. Nobody will know when you’re using your iPad, that’s how discreet it is!
  11. Anxious about getting your first iPad? Write away for this free iPad starter kit from Kimberly-Clark.
  12. You might find your iPad use to be irregular at first, but if you keep track of it in a calendar, you’ll eventually see a pattern emerging.
  13. The iPad: Jon Armstrong Is An Enthusiastic Supporter Of It And Plans To Get One. Soon. o
  14. Are you there, God? It’s me, iPad.
  15. If you spend a lot of time with your good girlfriends, you’ll find that you all start using your iPads at the same time.

Check out these list lovers:

  1. 5 Disturbing Developments Ripped From The Cultural Imagination Of Last Week | ABDPBT Personal Finance
  2. Alexis at The Well-Read Mom
  3. Tim at Safer By Choice
  4. Kevin from Always Home and Uncool
  5. Ginger at Ramble Ramble
  6. Heidi at The Maxwell’s Madness

Comments (17)

  1. Feb 1, 2010

    The only thing more brilliant than #13? #14!

  2. Feb 1, 2010

    One is never too old for this kind of humor, I mean really, they had it coming…#6 is probably my favorite, because I am a sicko like that 🙂

    Have a list going up.

  3. Feb 1, 2010

    Hey Anna- thanks for the shout out for my employer (#11). Great list here, I like the Kindle reference. I follow a group of Kindlers who will have no pad-envy when this is actually released.
    When Colbert pulled his out last night on the Grammys, it struck me that usually we make smaller smaller as technology advances. Now the iPod touch is growing and that is fabulous???
    My list is up.

  4. Feb 1, 2010

    I love #6, but I think #11 is my sentimental favorite. It took me right back to a Judy Blume place.

  5. Feb 1, 2010

    I love #11 & #14 (ah, nostalgia!) the best, but # 4 made me snort a little.

    My list is up.

  6. Yes indeedy. I think Judy Blume needs to get started on The Book That Will Lead Generations of Pre-Pubescent Teens to An Understanding of Their Technology pronto. LIke, stat.

  7. Feb 1, 2010


  8. Feb 1, 2010

    Alexis, you’re listed up.

  9. Feb 1, 2010

    Tim, I thought you would like that one. I am not tempted by the iPad at all and I LOVE my Kindle! I was a little annoyed by Colbert pulling out the iPad, actually. It felt like really awkward product placement.

  10. Feb 1, 2010

    Ahah! a special starter kit person!

  11. Feb 1, 2010

    You’re all linked up!

  12. Feb 1, 2010

    Kate, that would be a bestseller, I think!

  13. Feb 1, 2010

    I found you through Alexis’ blog…why did it take me so long??

    #6 and #14 are both snort-worthy!

    My very first list is up.

  14. Feb 2, 2010

    Love your lists. This one, though? Too damn perfect. #14 will be my all-time favorite iPad joke.

  15. Feb 2, 2010

    Kindle=toxic shock

    I snorted. That’s how hard that made me laugh. This is the best list of iPad snarks I’ve heard.


  16. Feb 2, 2010

    Hah! There are so many Judy Blume fans lurking out there.

  17. Feb 2, 2010

    I’m snickering at the PERIOD. Because I’m very mature.

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