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Fifth Periweekly ABDPBT Sucky Sweepstakes! Just in Time for Conspicuous Consumerism: Win a $100 American Express Gift Card!–TIME’S UP, SUCKAHS! Winners TBA tomorrow, and Tune in Next Week–One Giveaway Per Week Until Xmas!

Fifth Periweekly ABDPBT Sucky Sweepstakes! Just in Time for Conspicuous Consumerism: Win a $100 American Express Gift Card!–TIME’S UP, SUCKAHS! Winners TBA tomorrow, and Tune in Next Week–One Giveaway Per Week Until Xmas!

[singlepic=333,540,330,,center]
[singlepic=76,320,240,,right] That’s right, it’s that time again! I’d like to announce the fifth installment in my series of transparent self-promoting sweepstakes giveaways! We are shaking things up this time, so there are two different ways to enter:

  1. Find a candidate for “This Week in Stupid.” You may draw your example of stupid from news stories, popular culture, or your own life; the only requirement is that it demonstrates the wider cultural paradigm of stupidity that needs to be dissected so that it might be eliminated. Once you’ve located your candidate, post the story in the comments to this post.
  2. -or-

  3. The second option copies a technique I saw deployed yesterday, and that I’ve been kicking myself ever since for not thinking of first. You tweet this:

    RT @abdpbt is giving away a $100 American Express Gift Card on her blog–tweet or comment to enter http://www.abdpbt.com/?p=515

    And that’s it.

Now, since I’m feeling nice today, I’ve decided that you can enter both ways: once each. As always, it is up to you to sell your stupid, and I promise to be completely arbitrary and unfair in my choice of winner for the gift card. The deadline is really soon. Like, really, really, soon. But prolly not before 8:30 am PST, just because I might not be up by then. But you know, soon. So post those stupids in the comment section of this post ASAP and/or get tweeting before I cut you off, or it’s NO $100 AMERICAN EXPRESS GIFT CARD FOR YOU!!

Good luck!

Comments (30)

  1. Dec 4, 2008

    I tweeted you.

    As far as stupid, I suppose it’s a tossup between those three nitwit auto execs who think the American taxpayers – most of whom are too smart to buy American cars – are going to bail them out, or that Plaxico Burress character. It’s hard to beat Plaxico this week.

    I’d also like to nominate his mother (or whomever) for naming him Plaxico. Though, to be fair, that bit of stupidity didn’t happen this week.

  2. Marci
    Dec 4, 2008

    Man Says He Accidentally Shot Wife During Sex

    Police in Springfield, Ohio, are investigating after a man claimed to have accidentally shot his wife during sex.
    Timothy Havens told police he was reaching for something on the night stand when the pistol went off, hitting his wife, Carolyn Havens, in the upper chest.
    Carolyn, 42, is in critical condition in Miami Valley Hospital in Dayton, where she’s been since the Sunday shooting, according to the Columbia Dispatch.
    Deputies said Carolyn has an active restraining order against her husband.
    Deputies took Timothy into custody for further questioning and he could face charges for violating his restraining order.

  3. Dec 4, 2008

    From Chamblee Police, GA – Stupid victim of year: A woman reported that she had been scammed by a deceitful telemarketer. The caller, claiming to be from the National Grants for Government, convinced her to send them $150. (For what, I do not know), and she sent the money to an address in India via Western Union. Later, feeling that she had been ripped off, she called a number provided by the telemarketer and demanded her money back. They agreed to send back her $150 if she would send them another $100. She sent more money and called us a few days later because she never received her refund.

    Jen´s last blog post..Hi, remember me?

  4. Dec 4, 2008

    Jen’s entry reminded me of another good one … Philadelphia police were able to nab 85 fugitives by sending them notices of fake refund checks. They show up expecting $1400, get arrested. The best part was that some were still asking about their money while they were being handcuffed.

    http://www.pennlive.com/midstate/index.ssf/2008/12/philly_police_nab_85_fugitives.html

  5. Dec 4, 2008

    Here’s a lady at a local fast food restaurant who seemed to have never been to one before. Are we going to have to publish field manuals for ordering a double cheeseburger?

    Overheard in a fast food line

    Michael´s last blog post..Here’s A Cookie & $100 For Your 1.3 GPA

  6. Dec 4, 2008

    I like “God ordered me to ram vehicle: A man who rammed his truck into a woman’s vehicle on a highway early Friday told authorities he crashed into her while going more than 100 mph because God told him “she needed to be taken off the road.”

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28005693/

    Also – I will tweet you! (Or whatever, – that sounded kinda dirty).

    Amy´s last blog post..Were You Looking for Me?

  7. Dec 4, 2008

    THOMAS TOWNSHIP, Mich. – Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after “receiving sexual favors from a vacuum” at a car wash.

    The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County’s Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

    Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

    The suspect, whose name wasn’t immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail.

    http://www.goofball.com/news/INC20081019134420

    Oy. Just oy. (And a little *snortlaugh*, too.)

    Chibi Jeebs´s last blog post..What a weekend!

  8. Dec 4, 2008

    I tweeted you!
    My name on twitter is left_of_lost
    Fun contest!!

    Danielle-lee´s last blog post..The smell of memory

  9. Kerry
    Dec 4, 2008

    From the part of the country that is NOT clinging to guns and religion because they’re bitter, dammit:

    Pa. pizzeria says venison isn’t going on pies despite cook carving deer in restaurant kitchen

    ALLENTOWN, Pa. (AP) — A Pennsylvania pizzeria insists venison is not on the menu – despite the impression a customer may have gotten when she saw one of the cooks butchering a deer in the shop’s kitchen.

    The manager of Stromboli Pizza in Allentown says a customer saw one of the restaurant cooks carving up a deer Tuesday. But John Okumus says the venison was not intended for the store.

    He says he shot a doe during a hunt and left the carcass in the store’s kitchen for pickup by a friend. Okumus says a customer complained to the city health department after seeing a cook mistakenly butcher the deer.

    The department investigated the incident but did not issue a citation.

  10. Dec 4, 2008

    Okay, my cousin-in-law just brought home a pit bull to keep his wife and newborn baby (!) safe while he’s at work. The family has expressed concern over this choice, but cousin-in-law insists that pit bulls have a bad rap and that the dog will think of the baby as “one of his cubs.”

    WTF? Can one divorce her cousins-in-law? Also, dogs have cubs now. You’re welcome.

    becky´s last blog post..Turtlemania

  11. AKD
    Dec 4, 2008

    Accused Drunken Driver Ends Up Running Over Self
    http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2008/11/26/national/a052504S36.DTL&tsp=1

    When I saw the headline I thought “WHAT? How is that even possible?” and then when I read the story I was like, “I’m surprised that doesn’t happen more often.”

    “A man is in a northern New Mexico jail, accused of driving drunk and leading police on a chase that finally ended with him running over himself. Roy Travis Aguilar, 21, was treated for minor injuries at a Santa Fe hospital and booked into the Sandoval County detention center on charges of aggravated driving while intoxicated, fleeing a police officer, careless driving and two other outstanding traffic warrants. A tip on a police hot line Sunday afternoon reported a possible drunken driver on a highway. State Police Officer Grace Romero spotted Aguilar’s pickup truck swerving across both lanes of the highway, driving slowly and then fast. He refused to stop. After narrowly missing other vehicles, police said Aguilar drove through a ditch and a barbed-wire fence before stopping. He tried to put the truck into park, but it ended up in reverse. Police said Aguilar fell from his open door and both of his legs were run over by the front driver’s side tire.”

  12. Dec 4, 2008

    I was ministered in a bar. That’s STUPID. Also? I tweeted.

    http://twitter.com/exeverything/status/1038674311

    SUCKAS.

    the ex´s last blog post..Five Signs I’m Too Fucking Old.

  13. weezy
    Dec 4, 2008

    Even education is not a bar to stupidity. An attorney in the office where I work is having surgery on Friday afternoon to remove a kidney blockage and cyst, and yet thinks he’ll be “absolutely fine” to attend the office Christmas dinner on Saturday night.

  14. Dec 4, 2008

    I tweeted, but can’t seem to come up with anything that raises the stupid bar high enough.

    Ginger´s last blog post..Holiday gift-giving angst

  15. Jennie
    Dec 4, 2008

    This person called Becky made a comment on a blog about how Pit Bulls are a bad choice for a family dog without bothering to look at any statistics to justify such a claim, something I believe is called prejudice. You know what’s a better idea Becky? Your cousin should get a Pomeranian or a toy poodle. OH WAIT, they kill babies too, no mean feat when you weigh 4 lbs. In fact, cars kill babies at a much higher rate than do any breed of dog. For gods sake, I wouldn’t leave an infant, toddler, or small child alone with my 10 year old Black Lab, no matter how gentle he is. If your cousin-in-law isn’t capable of being a responsible person, than he probably shouldn’t have any dog.

    You may spare me a lecture on the death rate of dog bites and how Rottweilers, American Pit Bull terriers, Presa Canarios and mixed breed dogs have the highest one (see, I did my research). First of all, the statistics generally reported via online media are biased. That doesn’t mean their bite rate is the highest, and even if it did, the relative crime rate for Blacks in America is much higher than it is for whites. Does that mean that Black people are dangerous and you shouldn’t allow them around your children? I think not…

    That’s my stupid thing that happened this week.

  16. Dec 4, 2008

    I tweeted, but I can’t come up with any stupidity. Can I submit the entire Canadian government? They seem to think that three parties together can just overthrow the one in power without asking us.

    Also, pit bulls DO have a bad rap. But any dog with a baby is high-alert territory.

  17. Dec 4, 2008

    Must. not. offer. editorial. commentary. Must. be. strong.

  18. Heather
    Dec 4, 2008

    I tweeted you!

    As for stupid things.. insert any story about “Spencer and Heidi” … there is just no topping that kind of stupid. And if a specific example is required, they apparently just got married in order to steal some other chicks thunder or something ridiculous like that.

  19. Kerry
    Dec 4, 2008

    Wow–wouldn’t it be a strange twist if the stupidest thing happened on the comments of the Stupidest Thing post.

  20. Dec 4, 2008

    This comment section is getting all Lord of the Flies up in here. Next thing you know, sweetney will come by and drop a few dozen f-bombs or something.

  21. Dec 4, 2008

    No, wait. She already did that. Never mind.

  22. Dec 4, 2008

    I totally tweeted you. I think. I really only know how to tweet my own thoughts so not sure if that whole @abdpbt thing really works or if it’s a vicious rumor. So that’s its own brand of stupid.

    My other personal off-brand of stupid is that I’ve never ever before tried to enter one of these giveaway things. And we all know that in today’s economy we should all be trying to get as much free shit as possible.

  23. Kerry
    Dec 4, 2008

    Oh, I loved that thread on The Bathroom Wall, because then I went and googled “Poops on Peeps” and saw some crazy shit that made me wonder what the hell is wrong with people. Plus, it reinforced my belief that I could never be a mommy blogger, because people can be really ugly in a way they just aren’t (mostly) in other genres. I always learn new stuff here.

  24. Joanne
    Dec 4, 2008

    I twittered you from Outrageous_JEM.

  25. Dec 4, 2008

    People talk about testosterone causing fights . . . but estrogen has provoked many a flame war.

  26. Dec 4, 2008

    PS here’s another tidbit to complicate PitBullGate: My golden retriever was attacked (unprovoked) by a pitbull. That pitbull was put to sleep by its owners (NOT BECAUSE OF ME, I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT). Then, time passed. My golden retriever then attacked my baby (sort of). Now my golden retriever lives with my mom. Can we blame the pit bull for that? I think so! 🙂

  27. Joanne
    Dec 4, 2008

    Here I found a good story:

    Police discover suspected ‘robber’ at PNC bank was a cardboard cutout

    http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2008/11/28/2008-11-28_police_discover_suspected_robber_at_pnc_.html

    I started cracking up when I read this:-)

  28. Dec 4, 2008

    Re: tweets, I have an RSS feed going, so I know who you all are–don’t worry!

  29. Dec 4, 2008

    oh oh, here’s my first entry: i retweeted you! http://twitter.com/MommyNamedApril/status/1039308242

    MommyNamedApril´s last blog post..(Nearly?) Wordless Wednesday.

  30. Dec 4, 2008

    second entry!!!

    here’s a bunch of dumb for ya:

    Politicians in Australia’s most populous state could be breath-tested for alcohol before voting on laws after a series of late-night incidents that have embarrassed the center-left government.

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20081204/od_nm/us_breathtest

    MommyNamedApril´s last blog post..(Nearly?) Wordless Wednesday.