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Monthly Archives: September 2008

Shopping Malls, Cosmetic Branding, and Other Capitalist Miscellany: The Madeleines of My Things Past

[singlepic=201,440,330,,center] The mall in my hometown had just one department store, unless you count Woolworth’s. I don’t. Although I suppose it was, strictly speaking, a “department store” in that it had “departments.” But if we use that definition, then Walmart must also be a department store, along with Target, Sears, and K-Mart. And though I […]

A Different Breed of Geek; Or, Why Mainstream Media Sucks, Part 843,007

Mr. Right-Click left a copy of the latest Wired magazine on my vanity this morning. He claimed that there were some things of interest in it for me, and while flipping through it, he said, “See, they’ll have all this cool stuff, and then they bust out with something like this: [singlepic=200,440,330,,center] . . . […]

Imaginary Journalism: ABDPBT interviews Sarah Palin on Her List of Proposed Banned Books That Is Circulating the Internet Despite The Fact That It is Probably Bogus. Because What If It Weren’t? Wouldn’t This Be Funny?

My mother forwarded me an email yesterday from a group soliciting responses to be posted on a blog called Women Against Sarah Palin. Though I think Sarah Palin is an ignorant bigot fucktard, I must admit that I am hesitant to join a group that calls itself such a reactionary name–what are we against, exactly? […]

Boulevard of Broken Dreams

[singlepic=176,440,330,,center] Jon and Kate now have a billboard of their own on the Sunset Strip in West Hollywood, which is like the Times Square of Los Angeles, in case you’ve never visited it. But what’s that totally black building underneath it, you know right below the sign, below the ominous storm clouds that were gathering, […]

Time Is Running Out–Four Hours Left to Enter the Second Bimontly SemiMonthly Perrenial ABDPBT Sucky Sweepstakes!

[singlepic=76,320,240,,right]People, just a few hours left. Please go to the comment section of this post to enter to win a Diamancel Foot File. Just come up with your best example of stupid in the past week, and if you’d like to enter more than once, go for it! I will be picking the winner sometime […]

In Which I Betray Some Mommy Guilt, Thus Opening Myself Up to Faceless Internet Trolls Who Will Critique My Parenting Skills and–Worse–Declare Me Unfunny

[singlepic=175,440,330,,center] Have you seen my son? I mean, I know you haven’t seen his face directly, since I always cut the pictures off. But surely you can get a sense of him from those haphazardly cropped pictures, and the narratives I share about him, and when I put myself in his subject position for the […]

“Mini Spa Day” Copyright ®2008 By Mini Right-Click. All Rights Reserved. All Unauthorized Use Will Be Prosecuted.

[singlepic=165,440,330,,center] It was a Sunday, and Mommy and Daddy were fresh out of ideas for “enrichment activities” for me. Mommy said it was time to get another haircut, so they conferred, and decided that, at my age, getting a haircut is probably just as “enriching” as going to a museum. I found this assertion somewhat […]