This is not a Saturday Night Live Skit, I Swear, But it Might Be Next Week
From the New York Stock Exchange‘s website:
NEW YORK, Sept. 22, 2008 – The New York Stock Exchange today welcomed His Highness, Sheikh Nasser Al-Mohammad Al-Ahmad Al-Sabah, Prime Minister of the State of Kuwait. His Highness met with NYSE Euronext CEO Duncan Niederauer and commenced the day’s trading by ringing the NYSE Opening Bell.
“We are delighted to welcome His Highness on his first visit to the NYSE,” said Mr. Niederauer. “We look forward to furthering our relationship with Kuwait, and the prospect of listing the first company from Kuwait on our markets.”
“This is going to be one of the most important days in our history,” said His Highness, Sheikh Nasser Al-Mohammad Al-Ahmad Al-Sabah, Prime Minister of the State of Kuwait. “The NYSE is one of the most important stock exchanges in the world, and we’re glad to have a strong cooperative relationship with the NYSE that will hopefully enable Kuwait to list its first company in the U.S.”
The lead story teaser on last night’s news showed a clip version of the header picture and reported that, “Today, the stock market plunges another XYG points, while oil prices soar!” I have to assume that there is somebody in the newsroom and/or the video editing department who has a black sense of humor, because nobody could be so dumb as to air this without recognizing the irony and potential for comedy, could they?
Don’t answer that.
What I want to know is, why can’t we have news that is real and straightforward. Why can’t we have news that says, “Look at what a bunch of dumbshits we are–can you believe that at this point in our nation’s history, that THIS is the guy we choose to invite to ring the stupid stock exchange bell? Are you kidding me?”
If you go to another country, the news is not like our news. I am not talking about infotainment shows like Entertainment Tonight, Extra, or Inside Edition, here, either. I am talking about major network news. I know Charlie Gibson isn’t a dumbass, that is clear from when he interviewed a true dumbass a few weeks ago. So why can’t we have him saying something like, “Did you see that? Can you believe this? Are we actually watching the news, or is this a joke, like April Fools Day in September kind of a thing?”
Because you know that’s what he was thinking.
I’m tired of everything being dumbed down, neutralized, or submitted in code. The reason people think Americans are so stupid is because we insist on broadcasting shit like this, and then it goes unnoticed by the general public. Like people are sitting at home, eating their Chik-Fil-A and going, “Hey, look, a Kuwaiti is ringing the bell! Isn’t that nice.” And then turning the channel to American Idol.
On second thought, that probably is what they are doing.