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Wink Wankers

Wink Wankers

In online dating news, every wink-wanker under 5’10 and over 225 lbs in my greater metropolitan area seems to think I am in their league.

But then, maybe I am. Who’s to say? IF the market will support it, if the market will support it . . .

What is a wink-wanker, you ask? One of those dudes on match that cannot even be bothered to email you, they just send out winks to everyone and expect me to email them back. And if you do wink at a wink-wanker (I do not advise this), they will often say something like, “Thanks for winking at me,” like you initiated the whole thing in the first place.

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